You have 2 simple choices root for the raiders or sit down and shut the fuck up shirt

The tipping point came a few days ago, as I stared at my sweater pile not getting any bigger or any smaller, but rather just sticking out in my room like an eyesore, or a barnacle. God forbid someone on Zoom see this mound of sad wool peeking out. To grapple with it, I thought, Why not film myself going through my own wardrobe? Since no one is allowed in my space right now, I might as well sound off to the You have 2 simple choices root for the raiders or sit down and shut the fuck up shirt but in fact I love this digital world and talk myself through the process. In this bizarre Twilight Zone–adjacent universe that we are all currently living in, I could separate myself from my own body and talk myself through my wardrobe, as if I were my own therapist. I could kill the darlings of my closet. I had always dreamed of owning only what I wore, which is a rotation of about 10 items total. And more importantly, if I didn’t do it? Well, literally, no one else would, at least no time soon. Here’s what I learned.

You have 2 simple choices root for the raiders or sit down and shut the fuck up shirt, hoodie, tank top, sweater and long sleeve t-shirt

Don’t try to go through the You have 2 simple choices root for the raiders or sit down and shut the fuck up shirt but in fact I love this whole closet in one day. I promise it will never work, and you will end up discouraged. Instead, start with one section. This can be the tiniest section too! Hell, go through your underwear drawer and sift out all of those granny panties that reach your belly button. Personally, I recommend going with the part of your closet that is the most visible first. For me, that was a pile of sweaters. Once you get that done, everything else becomes easier.